July 2017 from Peter Steicke - Australia www.incrediblyloved.com/about-us/

Suddenly, it’s as if everything in Ian was imparted or blue-toothed to me.

My prayer partner Cees and I were in Amsterdam in 2006 on our way home from teaching and equipping in the Lutheran Church Mission in Uganda (LCMU).

As we sat on the tarmac at Entebbe airport waiting to leave Uganda, I looked out the window, rested my head, and said, “I never want to see this place again.”

We had worked hard. The people were hungry for the good news of Jesus. There were centrally located teaching times which lasted a couple of days, and then we would go and visit leaders in their local areas to encourage and equip them. We’d travelled to places you’d never be able to book through a tourist agency to see, over some of the bumpiest roads in the dustiest terrain. We’d leave early and get back late. On the journeys back from these field visits there would always be many questions to answer about what we’d taught. It was exhausting.

Then, to top it off, at Lira I got a fever out of nowhere. Cees and I were sitting down for a much anticipated evening meal after a full day of teaching and interacting. Just as my meal arrived I started to feel a bit strange. I picked at the meal and told Cees I was going to lie down. Part way back to the room I became completely disoriented and had to ask some members of a British educational team to help me find my room. I was so confused I couldn’t even use the key. They helped me in and lay me on the bed where my temperature proceeded to skyrocket. The Brits obviously got help because next minute one of the staff and Cees are swabbing me down with cold towels on my forehead, armpits, and groin while I was off in a gaga land of delusion. Half an hour later it was all over, but I was left drained and despondent. The sense of despair was still with me while sitting on the plane waiting to leave.

We flew to Amsterdam to spend a few days with Cees’ parents before returning to Australia, but I was in a demoralised state. Cees invited me to attend a church service with his sister and her family the next day, but I declined. However, at the last minute the next morning I changed my mind.

The Levend Evangelie Gemeente (Living Gospel Church) is a large charismatic community who are always looking to see their people be naturally engaging with others out of the love of the Father. It was neat being taken to the reception desk to pick up a headset, as the service was translated into a number of languages. The announcements, bible reading, prayers, and even song introductions were all beautifully translated.

Imagine my surprise then, when the person who got up to preach was speaking perfect English in a Canadian accent … with a translator for everyone else to understand!

His name was Ian Ross, and I gathered he’d shared there once or twice before. Ian was part of the senior staff when renewal began at the Catch the Fire Church in Toronto (formerly Toronto Airport Christian Fellowship) in January 1994. The Holy Spirit called Ian from that role in 1998 in order to carry the message of the Father's love to the nations on a full time basis.

When Ian took the microphone and began to speak I was immediately unimpressed. Listening through my despondent mindset I felt Ian and I were twins. In my memory, his opening words were something like, “Good morning, I’m Ian Ross. I don’t really feel like being here today as I’m tired. My wife Janice who normally travels with me can’t be here either. She’s having some time out for a couple of weeks processing some stuff.” I thought “give me a break!”

However my interest increased sharply as Ian related about his earlier career with IBM, his coming to faith, and his encounter with the incredible love of the heavenly Father. Then, after an introduction that would normally be the length of some peoples’ sermons Ian invited us to pray.

“Father, we come today to seek your heart, not just your hands.”

Suddenly, I saw it all. In an instant. One nano-second before I didn’t see what I saw so clearly now. And it was the real reason behind the despair afflicting me.

In a flash I saw the people we’d been ministering to in Africa who would share with us their needs and what they would like prayer for. “Please pray we have money for school fees.” “Pray that I can have a new bicycle to do more ministry work.” “Please pray for our crops.” My revelation was this: These beautiful people are so understandably anxious with getting things from the Father’s hands that they never actually get to his heart.

Then, in the same moment, I had an instantaneous picture of us in the western world. Our hands are full to overflowing with cars, houses, clothes, food, leisure pursuits, options, and excesses, to the point where we are completely preoccupied with them. We think the fullness of our hands equals the presence of God’s heart, hence we don’t go for his heart either.

So God has his children, all over the world, and few of them are going for his heart.

Ian’s prayer was short, but so powerfully revealing: “Father, we come today to seek your heart, not just your hands.”

Suddenly, near the end of Ian’s message on the Father’s love I had a picture in my mind of a large room in Jinja, Uganda. The Holy Spirit was impressing on my mind that I was to return the next year, with a team of people, to facilitate a conference where there would be at least two representatives from every congregation or preaching place of the LCMU, so that they could experience the love of the Father and be empowered to live from his heart and not just his hands. Where did that come from? Forty-five minutes earlier I didn’t want to leave Adelaide again, let alone go back to Uganda.

Next I heard Ian asking anyone who wanted a blessing from the Father’s heart to come down the front. No more invitation than that was needed. I had been full of despair, so why not take refreshment when it was being offered! Life was being breathed into me through a message from the Father’s heart when I’d been living from his hands. Plus, apart from Cees’ family, not one single person in that room knew me. I almost sprinted down the front and as soon as I got there, went to my knees and, yet again, started to cry. Ian just casually walked along, not saying anything I could audibly decipher, but laying his hands on peoples’ heads.

What a refreshing time. This didn’t feel like a quick shower to get the grime off when you’re dirty; rather, it was like a soak in a nice warm bath. I actually experienced in a tangible way the love of my heavenly Father. It was washing away despair, replacing a perfectionism mindset, and overcoming a tendency in me to sometimes see life through the lens of rejection. It was not hugely emotive in the happening—a man prayed over me whilst I was kneeling—but it was profoundly impacting in its depth. It was a personal love being placed in me. There was relief at being so richly accepted and loved for who I am, not what I did or achieved.

After a period of time—I honestly can’t remember—I got up off my knees and went to look for Ian to say thanks. Finding him I said, “Hi Ian. My name’s Peter. I’m a Lutheran pastor from Australia on my home from Uganda, and I’ve had it!” Ian just looked at me and smiled. He then placed one hand over my head and another on my ribcage. It felt as though a sword had pierced me. I doubled over, fell to my knees, and then fell gently to the ground. I was out to it. Again, I don’t know for how long. When I was conscious, there was Cees leaning over me praying, with Ian standing in the background grinning. Apparently Cees had seen me go to the ground from the other side of the building and came running over. Cees wasn't at all perturbed. He knew this was the Holy Spirit at work. He just wanted to be with me. Ian didn’t know this, nor did he know Cees. So, as I was informed later, Ian put out his arm to stop Cees saying, “Don’t worry, he’s a Lutheran pastor, he needs this!”

It’s true! I just didn’t know how much I needed it. Here’s the amazing thing. Suddenly, it’s as if everything in Ian was imparted or blue-toothed to me. I could have hopped on a plane back to Uganda right there and then and shared on the Father-heart of God. Bible verses from years of journaling started coming alive with the message of how incredibly loved we are. The despair had lifted in the light of that love. I still had to apply self-care and take rest due to all that had been experienced in Uganda, but I was doing it from a position of acceptance and living in the Father’s “well done”, rather than from a place of dejection and self-pity.